Thursday, September 15, 2011

June Lupus Flare Part 2

After being admitted to the hospital, the first thing they wanted me to do was give them a urine sample.  Well, I hadn't had any food or fluids in three days, so all I could manage to produce was a few drops of what resembled a blood sample more than a urine sample.  The nurse said that was not a good sign given the fact that I have two types of kidney disease.  The next lovely event on the agenda was to start an IV on me so they could begin trying to rehydrate me.  I knew I was really dehydrated, but I was about to find out just HOW dehydrated I really was!  The first nurse stuck me three times and could not get a vein.  I was trying to remain calm and be reassuring to the nurse so I wouldn't make her nervous about trying to get my IV started.  I told her I was a really hard stick on a good day because my arms are full of veins that roll and break, and given the fact that I had just lost 26 pounds in two weeks, my level of dehydration was making it much worse.  She tried one more time and broke another vein and my panic disorder started to make an appearance.  I am extremely afraid of needles, so by the fourth stick I was beginning to get teary-eyed, shaky, and labored breathing.  I cannot STAND to have a panic attack in front of anyone!  I always go and find a place to hide when it happens because it is SO embarrassing to be a grown woman crying and shaking uncontrollably like a little baby and once I get started, there's no way to turn it off!  That nurse left the room a nervous wreck and came back with two more nurses to see if they could get my IV started.  Nothing like adding insult to injury!  Now I'm having a full blown panic attack in front of three strangers who are all invading my personal space in a claustrophobic room while jabbing me repeatedly with needles!  All they could have done to have possibly made it worse was throw a damn spider on me!  Long story short is that six nurses and thirteen needle sticks later (no I'm not exaggerating, believe me, I wish I was) I finally had an IV started! 

I started getting a huge migraine from getting all stressed and panicky while being so weak and dehydrated and my stomach was really killing me.  All the nurses left the room and I thought I would finally be able to relax because the worst part was over.  WRONG.  In walks a phlebotomist.  GREAT.  More needles.  She tried three times to draw blood only to break a vein each time.  I start panicking again.  She calls for back up and two more vampires arrived to collect my blood and broke some more veins.  They ended up cutting slits in the tips of fingers and milking the blood from them into the vials they needed to fill.  I was now in full blown nauseated migraine pain, dizzy, stomach pain out of this world and exhausted.  I was so ready to get some meds and just rest, but of course I had to go to x-ray first.

I was only back in my room a few minutes when my preacher and his wife were there to visit!  I didn't even know they knew I was in the hospital!  My best friend had contacted them to let them know I needed prayers and they decided to come and check on me and pray for me.  I thought it was so nice for them to come and see me, especially so quickly.  At the same time I felt hurt that my own family wasn't showing the same level of care and concern.  I had called my mom earlier and asked her if she could bring my phone charger when she comes to visit me because my cell was going dead and she told me she didn't know if she was coming up to visit or not, but she might if she decided to come to town to pay her electric bill.  Wow, as long as you can fit me into your errands Mom, don't go out of your way to come visit me.  Sometimes my family really hurts my feelings with their reactions to my illness.  I guess they look at it as a routine thing that I am sick, so it doesn't warrant any special attention.  I just know if one of them were in the hospital I would be there for them.

The doctor came by to visit that night (my mom, by the way, did not) and told me he was going to be testing for any kind of bacteria or virus or parasite that could be causing my problems just to be sure he doesn't overlook anything.  His gut feeling was that it was lupus related, but he never likes to take chances and miss something important.  He said he was alarmed with my urine results because my kidneys were obviously struggling, but being that I was severely dehydrated, he was hoping that getting some fluids into me would be a big help with that.  So the waiting game began as I spent my first (mostly sleepless) night in the hospital.  I had to be put on morphine for my pain and migraine so I was in and out.  The next day would prove to be a bit of a eye opener for my mom.


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